Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Male Mortality

It has come to my attention that women live longer then men. This concerns me because I myself tend to be of the male persuasion. Moreover one of the main purposes of living, as I understand it, is to stay that way. People have even been known to eat tofu and to engage in spinning just to prolong the whole “mortal coil” experience.

Part of this gender difference is due to statistics. Historically, men have been responsible for some of the more dangerous activities, such as fighting wars, hunting ferocious beasts and standing up on roller coasters. Naturally this lowers their average life expectancy.

But more important is the evolutionary basis. After the child-bearing years, women still have a vital role to play in imparting some common sense to the offspring. Men, on the other hand, would have to wait many thousands of years for the invention of tightly-sealed jars. Even lawn mowers, which used to be called scythes, were a good ways off. (As a side note, the Grim Reaper, that lovable personification of death, is usually depicted carrying a scythe, suggesting that mowing the lawn is potentially fatal. This is why I’ve avoided it.)

There are signs that the forces of nature are again trying to correct an imbalance, overpopulation, by thinning the herd. Humans, once content with bowling and miniature golf, now seek out sports like rock climbing and bungee jumping. Fortunately, these are very egalitarian pastimes. Nearly as many women engage in these as men. Correcting the gender injustice is long overdue!

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